AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Friday, March 24, 2006 ----- BODY: Circle this coming Sunday in your datebook as VH1 Classic throws it's hat into the ring by reaching into your pockets for more money to send to New Orleans! When will this come to an end? I've got news for the people that live down there: Katrina wasn't a once in a lifetime event. Nope. There's probably going to be another storm just as bad, if not worse this year, next year, and the year after that too! All the money in the National Reserve can be bundled up and shipped out there and it won't help. It's a thing called a hole in the ozone layer and global warming. This isn't as simple as taking your Oldsmobile into the shop for a hole in the radiator. Just think: All the cans of whipped cream and Cheeze Whiz you've consumed in your lifetime are partly resposible! Anyway, the classic video channel kicks things off on Sunday with a few hour marathon of one hit wonder Nena and "99 Red Balloons". After that, you get to call in and get your favorites played. I'd like to see Van Halen however, considering the asking price for an hour's block of videos is $35,000, I may as well have what's left of the group come to my house and do a set in the living room! Kissing and telling: Now you can stink like Gene and Paul or Ace and Peter. Proving once again that a farewell is never really a goodbye, the Kiss Army is expanding into the men's cologne business...really! Look for it in the coming months. Poof! And he's gone. So, David Copperfield bailed out on one of his shows yesterday? He was having stomach pains "allegedly" and was taken to a nearby hospital. Always the showman, Copperfield even fooled the staff with his vanishing act. When it was time to pay the bill, Copperfield vanished into thin air and left without a trace. They're still looking for him in Indiana! Chewing and frying the fat with Tom Arnold and friends. I guess someone in America couldn't sleep until their wish came true. We've already danced with the stars, skated with the stars...now, who's ready to cook with the stars? Tom Arnold was the first to jump at the chance. He's so wired anyway that he'll jump at anything! There's some other "B" list Hollywood types taking part as well. I'm sure we won't see it, but I'd like to see Emeril Lagasse or Bobby Flay mix it up with the guy. Don't expect to see Roseanne, although that may be interesting too! Finally, as read in Bob Feder's column today in The Sun Times, September marks the end of another Channel 7 employee's outstanding career. Reporter Frank Mathie is moving down the ranks to part-time employee. He isn't expecting any fanfare but that's dandy, they weren't going to give him any anyway. He wanted to retire all together, but Channel 7 bosses insisted he stay on board. You see, even after all these years, Mathie gets as much respect as the newspaper at the bottom of a birdcage. Quite honestly, nobody else is up for the ridicule that comes from his assignments. As the photo shows, Mathie has given us all the stories we've come to appreciate over the years like the old lady who baked cookies with icing resembliing Bush and Kerry. Who can forget the giraffe with three legs at the zoo? How about the lady with the biggest collection of buttons or the man who made a replica of a 1950's street in his basement. And there's really no one else out there with a cameraman and microphone who would use their journalism skills on a water skiing squirrel. Thank goodnness there's still several months left to report the Canadian Goose stuck in the tree! THAT'S the way I see it this week! -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: What do these three have in common? All are part of news you may have missed!

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Friday, March 24, 2006

What do these three have in common? All are part of news you may have missed!

Circle this coming Sunday in your datebook as VH1 Classic throws it's hat into the ring by reaching into your pockets for more money to send to New Orleans! When will this come to an end? I've got news for the people that live down there: Katrina wasn't a once in a lifetime event. Nope. There's probably going to be another storm just as bad, if not worse this year, next year, and the year after that too! All the money in the National Reserve can be bundled up and shipped out there and it won't help. It's a thing called a hole in the ozone layer and global warming. This isn't as simple as taking your Oldsmobile into the shop for a hole in the radiator. Just think: All the cans of whipped cream and Cheeze Whiz you've consumed in your lifetime are partly resposible! Anyway, the classic video channel kicks things off on Sunday with a few hour marathon of one hit wonder Nena and "99 Red Balloons". After that, you get to call in and get your favorites played. I'd like to see Van Halen however, considering the asking price for an hour's block of videos is $35,000, I may as well have what's left of the group come to my house and do a set in the living room! Kissing and telling: Now you can stink like Gene and Paul or Ace and Peter. Proving once again that a farewell is never really a goodbye, the Kiss Army is expanding into the men's cologne business...really! Look for it in the coming months. Poof! And he's gone. So, David Copperfield bailed out on one of his shows yesterday? He was having stomach pains "allegedly" and was taken to a nearby hospital. Always the showman, Copperfield even fooled the staff with his vanishing act. When it was time to pay the bill, Copperfield vanished into thin air and left without a trace. They're still looking for him in Indiana! Chewing and frying the fat with Tom Arnold and friends. I guess someone in America couldn't sleep until their wish came true. We've already danced with the stars, skated with the stars...now, who's ready to cook with the stars? Tom Arnold was the first to jump at the chance. He's so wired anyway that he'll jump at anything! There's some other "B" list Hollywood types taking part as well. I'm sure we won't see it, but I'd like to see Emeril Lagasse or Bobby Flay mix it up with the guy. Don't expect to see Roseanne, although that may be interesting too! Finally, as read in Bob Feder's column today in The Sun Times, September marks the end of another Channel 7 employee's outstanding career. Reporter Frank Mathie is moving down the ranks to part-time employee. He isn't expecting any fanfare but that's dandy, they weren't going to give him any anyway. He wanted to retire all together, but Channel 7 bosses insisted he stay on board. You see, even after all these years, Mathie gets as much respect as the newspaper at the bottom of a birdcage. Quite honestly, nobody else is up for the ridicule that comes from his assignments. As the photo shows, Mathie has given us all the stories we've come to appreciate over the years like the old lady who baked cookies with icing resembliing Bush and Kerry. Who can forget the giraffe with three legs at the zoo? How about the lady with the biggest collection of buttons or the man who made a replica of a 1950's street in his basement. And there's really no one else out there with a cameraman and microphone who would use their journalism skills on a water skiing squirrel. Thank goodnness there's still several months left to report the Canadian Goose stuck in the tree! THAT'S the way I see it this week!

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Friday, March 24, 2006

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