AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Thursday, March 24, 2005 ----- BODY: The Easter Bunny and The Miranda Rights Hard to believe I just took down the Christmas tree a couple of days ago, and now it's time for Easter. This day means different things to different people, but as is the case with Christmas, little kids wait for some kind of person in a rented costume to swing by the house and deliver a bunch of candy. Sometimes it's just mom and dad playing the part, or some of the luckier ones actually get to meet the Easter Bunny in person. It's usually some guy from the dad's office that dad has some dirt on and the guy doesn't want to get fired so he does it "as a favor" to dad. Until then, the kids get to meet the Easter Bunny at the mall and get a photo taken and the whole works. People have been making fun of the guys that play Santa at the malls for years. This week however, I discovered that Mr. Bunny is doing everything he can to tarnish his reputation and get his picture on thesmokinggun.com. As reported in the news earlier this week, a man playing the part of Mr. Bunny at a mall outside Indianapolis, left his post for a break and wandered into a Victoria's Secret to steal some lingerie. The only problem was, he left his costume on, as if nobody would be watching him. The cops were faced with a big decision: How to get the guy out of the store without children seeing what was going on because well, it just doesn't look good when the Easter Bunny gets escorted out in handcuffs. They made him go into a dressing room and take off the costume (YES, it WOULD have been funny if they made him put the underwear on, but they put a blanket over him). Elsewhere, another man dressed as Mr. Bugs was arrested for getting into a fistfight with an angry parent over a bad photo. All this happened in FRONT of all the kids waiting in line. That got me to thinking... That Easter Bunny is one slippery son of a bitch. He's a no good crook and thief , and John Walsh should be looking for him on Saturday night instead of some sap that robbed a dry cleaners in Des Moines back in 1973. It all makes sense. You always see the Easter Bunny running with a basket of eggs. Obviously, they don't belong to him. When was the last time you saw a rabbit lay an egg? He stole those from the henhouse and that's probably why he's running! What the kids need is somthing like an Easter Ostrich. It may only have one egg, but it's a BIG ONE. -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: Anyone for Rabbit Stew?

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Thursday, March 24, 2005

Anyone for Rabbit Stew?

The Easter Bunny and The Miranda Rights Hard to believe I just took down the Christmas tree a couple of days ago, and now it's time for Easter. This day means different things to different people, but as is the case with Christmas, little kids wait for some kind of person in a rented costume to swing by the house and deliver a bunch of candy. Sometimes it's just mom and dad playing the part, or some of the luckier ones actually get to meet the Easter Bunny in person. It's usually some guy from the dad's office that dad has some dirt on and the guy doesn't want to get fired so he does it "as a favor" to dad. Until then, the kids get to meet the Easter Bunny at the mall and get a photo taken and the whole works. People have been making fun of the guys that play Santa at the malls for years. This week however, I discovered that Mr. Bunny is doing everything he can to tarnish his reputation and get his picture on thesmokinggun.com. As reported in the news earlier this week, a man playing the part of Mr. Bunny at a mall outside Indianapolis, left his post for a break and wandered into a Victoria's Secret to steal some lingerie. The only problem was, he left his costume on, as if nobody would be watching him. The cops were faced with a big decision: How to get the guy out of the store without children seeing what was going on because well, it just doesn't look good when the Easter Bunny gets escorted out in handcuffs. They made him go into a dressing room and take off the costume (YES, it WOULD have been funny if they made him put the underwear on, but they put a blanket over him). Elsewhere, another man dressed as Mr. Bugs was arrested for getting into a fistfight with an angry parent over a bad photo. All this happened in FRONT of all the kids waiting in line. That got me to thinking... That Easter Bunny is one slippery son of a bitch. He's a no good crook and thief , and John Walsh should be looking for him on Saturday night instead of some sap that robbed a dry cleaners in Des Moines back in 1973. It all makes sense. You always see the Easter Bunny running with a basket of eggs. Obviously, they don't belong to him. When was the last time you saw a rabbit lay an egg? He stole those from the henhouse and that's probably why he's running! What the kids need is somthing like an Easter Ostrich. It may only have one egg, but it's a BIG ONE.

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Thursday, March 24, 2005

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