AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Friday, June 02, 2006 ----- BODY: First of all, after another seven day break, I once again want to thank the fine folks at Yahoo In the Middle East for making it impossible for me to go a few days without DSL problems. You see, Yahoo is based in California with a long list of employees however, when you try and talk to someone, the phone call turns into an INTERNATIONAL call. This may be yet another conspiracy consideering their partnership with AT&T. How is someone that lives in a shack made of mud and sod going to solve my customer service issues? Moving on to some things I came across this week...Things weren't too happy in New York this week either. Not for the lucky lady who was victim of a practical joke played on her by a co-worker. While this woman and her companion were both EMT's riding back to the firehouse in their ambulance, the guy in the back who in the middle of his first week on the job thought it would be funny to lift up the pads of the defibulator and sneak up on her while she was driving and pretend to use them on her. Well, no pretend . The guy had no idea that the machine was turned on. He shocked her, caused her to have a heart attack and that resulted in her death. Not to mention the fact that she was driving and crashed the ambulance. The prankster in the back walked away without a scratch. He didn't exactly get too far as he was arrested and charged with manslaughter. As for the woman he killed, her family isn't too pleased that this guy is only getting seven years in the slammer. That's one "Jackass" stunt that I guess Johnny Knoxville never even thought of! Now, everyone knows Hardee's serves a good share of grease and fat no matter what the time of day. Did you know that you know longer need to divide your dining routine into three times a day? The people at Hardee's have broken new ground by putting all the bad stuff into one sandwich you can have at lunch? It's supposed to be a bacon cheeseburger and on top of that, roast beef, green peppers, onions and more cheese. Supposedly, the caloric content checks in at just under 1000. This is meant as the rebuttal to Burger King's big Texas double Whopper or whatever it is. Since a lot of their customers do all their eating in the car while driving, it's a good thing that the Chicago area Hardee's are small in numbers. Maybe now would be a good time for lawmakers to consider the DWE law (that's driving while eating). Finally, remember the good old days when between June and September you were supposed to spend quality time with family and there was no reason to watch reruns? Yeah, those days are gone now that there's all these summer replacements. I'm into it. The first thing out of the gate I saw was CBS' "Game Show Marathon". It's a "who's who of has beens" these contestants are supposed to be famous...ten years ago maybe. I like to call this whole thing "People in Hollywood with that have failed shows on CBS but are still under some kind of contractual obligation to participate in these events". Long title but...Rikki Lake, Leslie Nielson, and even N'SYNC's Lance Bass all had development deals for shows that were show bad they never aired! Then there's Tim Meadows, an alum of SNL. He's had a show on almost every network and I can't name one. I wonder if they bothered to call Drew Carey to see what he's up to? The classic game shows are always good, but only good when they have the original hosts and real folks! This other one has so they say, real people. The premise of the show which is to air next month on one of the cable channels is two bridal parties arguing over who gets their wedding reception in a fancy hotel. In what is supposed to be a combination of "Double Dare" and "Fear Factor", these folks are going to battle and the winner gets the wedding of their dreams! I kid you not! Who comes up with this nonsense anyway? A first grader? First, they want to teach all of us nitwits to spell by airing a spelling bee, and the next night they need the same nitwits to watch "The Nanny?" I really feel stupid now! -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: "911? Was this dumb!", "3 meals rolled into one" and "You may hit the bride"

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Friday, June 02, 2006

"911? Was this dumb!", "3 meals rolled into one" and "You may hit the bride"

First of all, after another seven day break, I once again want to thank the fine folks at Yahoo In the Middle East for making it impossible for me to go a few days without DSL problems. You see, Yahoo is based in California with a long list of employees however, when you try and talk to someone, the phone call turns into an INTERNATIONAL call. This may be yet another conspiracy consideering their partnership with AT&T. How is someone that lives in a shack made of mud and sod going to solve my customer service issues? Moving on to some things I came across this week...Things weren't too happy in New York this week either. Not for the lucky lady who was victim of a practical joke played on her by a co-worker. While this woman and her companion were both EMT's riding back to the firehouse in their ambulance, the guy in the back who in the middle of his first week on the job thought it would be funny to lift up the pads of the defibulator and sneak up on her while she was driving and pretend to use them on her. Well, no pretend . The guy had no idea that the machine was turned on. He shocked her, caused her to have a heart attack and that resulted in her death. Not to mention the fact that she was driving and crashed the ambulance. The prankster in the back walked away without a scratch. He didn't exactly get too far as he was arrested and charged with manslaughter. As for the woman he killed, her family isn't too pleased that this guy is only getting seven years in the slammer. That's one "Jackass" stunt that I guess Johnny Knoxville never even thought of! Now, everyone knows Hardee's serves a good share of grease and fat no matter what the time of day. Did you know that you know longer need to divide your dining routine into three times a day? The people at Hardee's have broken new ground by putting all the bad stuff into one sandwich you can have at lunch? It's supposed to be a bacon cheeseburger and on top of that, roast beef, green peppers, onions and more cheese. Supposedly, the caloric content checks in at just under 1000. This is meant as the rebuttal to Burger King's big Texas double Whopper or whatever it is. Since a lot of their customers do all their eating in the car while driving, it's a good thing that the Chicago area Hardee's are small in numbers. Maybe now would be a good time for lawmakers to consider the DWE law (that's driving while eating). Finally, remember the good old days when between June and September you were supposed to spend quality time with family and there was no reason to watch reruns? Yeah, those days are gone now that there's all these summer replacements. I'm into it. The first thing out of the gate I saw was CBS' "Game Show Marathon". It's a "who's who of has beens" these contestants are supposed to be famous...ten years ago maybe. I like to call this whole thing "People in Hollywood with that have failed shows on CBS but are still under some kind of contractual obligation to participate in these events". Long title but...Rikki Lake, Leslie Nielson, and even N'SYNC's Lance Bass all had development deals for shows that were show bad they never aired! Then there's Tim Meadows, an alum of SNL. He's had a show on almost every network and I can't name one. I wonder if they bothered to call Drew Carey to see what he's up to? The classic game shows are always good, but only good when they have the original hosts and real folks! This other one has so they say, real people. The premise of the show which is to air next month on one of the cable channels is two bridal parties arguing over who gets their wedding reception in a fancy hotel. In what is supposed to be a combination of "Double Dare" and "Fear Factor", these folks are going to battle and the winner gets the wedding of their dreams! I kid you not! Who comes up with this nonsense anyway? A first grader? First, they want to teach all of us nitwits to spell by airing a spelling bee, and the next night they need the same nitwits to watch "The Nanny?" I really feel stupid now!

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Friday, June 02, 2006

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