AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Sunday, June 19, 2005 ----- BODY: These Dads started the celebrating in the wee hours of the morning! Maybe one of these guys is yours! Finally, we've come to the time of year where we can honor the one person most often overlooked and treated like a doormat..."Dear Old Dad!" Not only is this the guy that worked so hard to feed and put clothes on you, that he worked himself into a nervous breakdown, he's also the guy that cheated on your Mom, whacked you with his belt, and burnt you with his lit cigarette when he wanted to know where you were last night. He's also the man that sits in his favorite chair on a Sunday while watching anything on television that includes, a uniform, jockstrap, or helmet while he snaps his fingers and curses at your Mom to "Bring another friggin' beer!" That's Dad for sure! He's also the guy that sits at the dinner table burping, farting, and wiping his mouth in his undershirt before throwing yesterday's leftovers in the garbage because he "Ain't eating that shit again!" Dad is a savvy shopper too! If Lowe's has a garden hose for $10, he'll spend a whole day and a whole tank of gas driving from Home Depot, to Menards, to Sears, and True Value just to show your Mom the receipt for the hose that he picked up at Ace Hardware for $9.99. Dad is a good chef too. When he grills steaks or burgers outside, you have two choices: bloody or black...no in-between. Dad's also a good mechanic. Even if his car is still under warranty, he's going to fix it himself because he can "Do a better job." Dad is also one of these guys you see at Auto Zone who are so anxious to get the car running right that they insist on fixing the car, right there in the parking lot. Your Dear Dad has to put up with you, your Mother, and your brothers and sisters 364 days a year. On a day like today, he doesn't want you swarming all over him...he wants you to give him a break on the 365th day...THAT'S the way I see it! I know. Next year, I'm going to be in the same dilly of a pickle. -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: "Sappy Frogger's Date!"

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Sunday, June 19, 2005

"Sappy Frogger's Date!"

These Dads started the celebrating in the wee hours of the morning! Maybe one of these guys is yours! Finally, we've come to the time of year where we can honor the one person most often overlooked and treated like a doormat..."Dear Old Dad!" Not only is this the guy that worked so hard to feed and put clothes on you, that he worked himself into a nervous breakdown, he's also the guy that cheated on your Mom, whacked you with his belt, and burnt you with his lit cigarette when he wanted to know where you were last night. He's also the man that sits in his favorite chair on a Sunday while watching anything on television that includes, a uniform, jockstrap, or helmet while he snaps his fingers and curses at your Mom to "Bring another friggin' beer!" That's Dad for sure! He's also the guy that sits at the dinner table burping, farting, and wiping his mouth in his undershirt before throwing yesterday's leftovers in the garbage because he "Ain't eating that shit again!" Dad is a savvy shopper too! If Lowe's has a garden hose for $10, he'll spend a whole day and a whole tank of gas driving from Home Depot, to Menards, to Sears, and True Value just to show your Mom the receipt for the hose that he picked up at Ace Hardware for $9.99. Dad is a good chef too. When he grills steaks or burgers outside, you have two choices: bloody or black...no in-between. Dad's also a good mechanic. Even if his car is still under warranty, he's going to fix it himself because he can "Do a better job." Dad is also one of these guys you see at Auto Zone who are so anxious to get the car running right that they insist on fixing the car, right there in the parking lot. Your Dear Dad has to put up with you, your Mother, and your brothers and sisters 364 days a year. On a day like today, he doesn't want you swarming all over him...he wants you to give him a break on the 365th day...THAT'S the way I see it! I know. Next year, I'm going to be in the same dilly of a pickle.

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Sunday, June 19, 2005

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