AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Sunday, May 15, 2005 ----- BODY: McGruff the police dog used to be one bad...(shut your mouth!). Nearly 25 years later, I think it's time for him to retire, or better still, be put down. It began as a good idea with the cartoon dog being the subject of TV ads, comic strips, and coloring books with the catchphrase, "Take a bite outta crime!" the dog would bark in his Jimmy Durante sounding voice. He came around the same time as "Energy Ant" which got started in the late 1970's by then President Jimmy Carter that urged kids to turn off the lights. "Energy Ant" got stomped on years ago while this police dog is still here, kind of like the guy that gets fired but still goes to work because it hasn't sunk in yet. I mention all this because this past Saturday, many of the area police deprtments turned to the old dog for a series of events that tried to get kids involved with being observant to what's going on in the neighborhoods. Imagine that? The police can't do it on their own, they need the help of third and fourth graders to sweep the streets clean! The idea is as loony as the cartoon dog himself! Years ago, McGruff would only show up in the middle of afterschool cartoons on TV and the occasional obligatory grammar school appearance and that was it. When I was a kid, we never had any of these fun fairs, parades, and activities the police have for kids now. This is exactly like locking the barn door after the horse already got out and ran away! If McGruff had any scruples, when he visited on Saturday and took a look around, he would have quit, but I think his boss needs to cut him loose. That dog was a pushover in 1980 and somewhere in-between then and now, he got neutred! It's 2005 now and time for something new. When McGruff hangs up his hat and coat for good, they need to consider a different approach without that dog. If they must keep a cartoon charachter, make the dog a pit pull. He's mean, growls, shows his teeth, and drools. You don't see many crooks pulling a fast one on a dog like that or givimg him the slip. The other idea is to scrap the comic completely and use Dwayne "Dog" Chapman the bounty hunter, who also has his own reality show on A&E. When his name gets mentioned in the state of Hawaii, the locals run for the hills and duck under tables. He's pretty much a one man show and he always gets his man or, in some cases, women. Now that McGruff has left town and the crooks and gangbangers have stopped giggling, I'll still have to double lock the door tonight before I go to sleep. Sorry McGruff, if you insist on sticking around, I suggest the force give you a desk job or writing traffic citations. Bring in a new dog...one that will make the bad guys poop their pants! ...and THAT'S the way I see it! -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: McGruff's bark is a lot bigger than his bite!

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Sunday, May 15, 2005

McGruff's bark is a lot bigger than his bite!

McGruff the police dog used to be one bad...(shut your mouth!). Nearly 25 years later, I think it's time for him to retire, or better still, be put down. It began as a good idea with the cartoon dog being the subject of TV ads, comic strips, and coloring books with the catchphrase, "Take a bite outta crime!" the dog would bark in his Jimmy Durante sounding voice. He came around the same time as "Energy Ant" which got started in the late 1970's by then President Jimmy Carter that urged kids to turn off the lights. "Energy Ant" got stomped on years ago while this police dog is still here, kind of like the guy that gets fired but still goes to work because it hasn't sunk in yet. I mention all this because this past Saturday, many of the area police deprtments turned to the old dog for a series of events that tried to get kids involved with being observant to what's going on in the neighborhoods. Imagine that? The police can't do it on their own, they need the help of third and fourth graders to sweep the streets clean! The idea is as loony as the cartoon dog himself! Years ago, McGruff would only show up in the middle of afterschool cartoons on TV and the occasional obligatory grammar school appearance and that was it. When I was a kid, we never had any of these fun fairs, parades, and activities the police have for kids now. This is exactly like locking the barn door after the horse already got out and ran away! If McGruff had any scruples, when he visited on Saturday and took a look around, he would have quit, but I think his boss needs to cut him loose. That dog was a pushover in 1980 and somewhere in-between then and now, he got neutred! It's 2005 now and time for something new. When McGruff hangs up his hat and coat for good, they need to consider a different approach without that dog. If they must keep a cartoon charachter, make the dog a pit pull. He's mean, growls, shows his teeth, and drools. You don't see many crooks pulling a fast one on a dog like that or givimg him the slip. The other idea is to scrap the comic completely and use Dwayne "Dog" Chapman the bounty hunter, who also has his own reality show on A&E. When his name gets mentioned in the state of Hawaii, the locals run for the hills and duck under tables. He's pretty much a one man show and he always gets his man or, in some cases, women. Now that McGruff has left town and the crooks and gangbangers have stopped giggling, I'll still have to double lock the door tonight before I go to sleep. Sorry McGruff, if you insist on sticking around, I suggest the force give you a desk job or writing traffic citations. Bring in a new dog...one that will make the bad guys poop their pants! ...and THAT'S the way I see it!

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Sunday, May 15, 2005

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