AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Friday, October 21, 2005 ----- BODY: GUESS WHO WON THE BIG $$$$ PLAYING POWERBALL! Well, it sure as hell wasn't me. Matter of fact, nobody knows who won the big jackpot from this past weekend's POWERBALL drawing however, one person has already come forward to claim his share of the prize: Sen. Judd Gregg of New Hampshire. Now in the biggest cock and bull story I ever heard, this guy plays the lottery religiously like a lot of the old-timers do waiting to win "The Big One"...now he wins, and says the $860,ooo he won will go to charity! Nope. I don't believe it either. Every elderly person I know that plays week after week thinks there's a "system" to win. Kind of like how people think there's a pattern to what comes up on a slot machine. Every 100,000 spins will result in a big payoff! That's why people sit for hours watching someone else lose their money and keep doing the math in their head and jump on the machine as soon as the person gets up. In a similar twist, the ping pong balls in the machine MUST blow around and fall into the slots in some pattern too. They fill out their cards with number combinations including birthdays, dates that loved one's died, address', telephone numbers...you name it. The sole winner of the POWERBALL drawing hasn't come forward yet because when he does, everyone comes out of the woodwork. Even people who you waved "hello" to on the street 20 years ago somehow finds where you live. This Senator though, he's setting an example that money doesn't matter even though you spend $20 weekly trying to win it. Let's see if the unidentified winner of the $340 million from Oregon is giving his money to The Little Sisters of The Poor. Sorry Senator, I doubt you are either! ..."When the lights go down in the city", you won't find former Journey lead singer, Steve Perry anywhere around the streets of Chicagoland. You know, the Sox invited him and the rest of Journey to come and sing the National Anthem at the game this weekend. Everyone knows that the Sox have made "Don't stop believing" their unnofficial theme song for the 2005 season. The boys on the team were real gung-ho to have Steve Perry and Journey sing in person. That presented a slight problem due to the fact that nearly ten years ago the band kicked Perry out. They did work things out and even made an album five years ago BUT, the reunion was brief. During a concert tour, Perry's Mother was lying on her deathbed and he cut the tour short to go home. The rest of the group told him that if he goes home that he can stay because "The show must go on". He left and returned only to find that they replaced him with a look-alike and sound-alike from another band. Kind of like the Judas Priest saga which turned into the movie "Rock Star" with Mark Wahlberg and Jennifer Anniston. Now, when the Sox invite "Journey" to play, are they inviting Steve Perry by himself, or the revamped Journey? For the two singers to shake hands and sing a song together like Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins did recently after their Genesis feud 30 years ago, it ain't looking good. As a matter of fact, BOTH Perry and the updated Journey were asked after the other said "no". Unless there's a 9th inning miracle, the Sox will have to settle for the "Greatest Hits" CD on their boom box. THAT'S the way I see it today! Happy Friday! -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: When your number's up and Steve Perry's sour grapes...

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Friday, October 21, 2005

When your number's up and Steve Perry's sour grapes...

GUESS WHO WON THE BIG $$$$ PLAYING POWERBALL! Well, it sure as hell wasn't me. Matter of fact, nobody knows who won the big jackpot from this past weekend's POWERBALL drawing however, one person has already come forward to claim his share of the prize: Sen. Judd Gregg of New Hampshire. Now in the biggest cock and bull story I ever heard, this guy plays the lottery religiously like a lot of the old-timers do waiting to win "The Big One"...now he wins, and says the $860,ooo he won will go to charity! Nope. I don't believe it either. Every elderly person I know that plays week after week thinks there's a "system" to win. Kind of like how people think there's a pattern to what comes up on a slot machine. Every 100,000 spins will result in a big payoff! That's why people sit for hours watching someone else lose their money and keep doing the math in their head and jump on the machine as soon as the person gets up. In a similar twist, the ping pong balls in the machine MUST blow around and fall into the slots in some pattern too. They fill out their cards with number combinations including birthdays, dates that loved one's died, address', telephone numbers...you name it. The sole winner of the POWERBALL drawing hasn't come forward yet because when he does, everyone comes out of the woodwork. Even people who you waved "hello" to on the street 20 years ago somehow finds where you live. This Senator though, he's setting an example that money doesn't matter even though you spend $20 weekly trying to win it. Let's see if the unidentified winner of the $340 million from Oregon is giving his money to The Little Sisters of The Poor. Sorry Senator, I doubt you are either! ..."When the lights go down in the city", you won't find former Journey lead singer, Steve Perry anywhere around the streets of Chicagoland. You know, the Sox invited him and the rest of Journey to come and sing the National Anthem at the game this weekend. Everyone knows that the Sox have made "Don't stop believing" their unnofficial theme song for the 2005 season. The boys on the team were real gung-ho to have Steve Perry and Journey sing in person. That presented a slight problem due to the fact that nearly ten years ago the band kicked Perry out. They did work things out and even made an album five years ago BUT, the reunion was brief. During a concert tour, Perry's Mother was lying on her deathbed and he cut the tour short to go home. The rest of the group told him that if he goes home that he can stay because "The show must go on". He left and returned only to find that they replaced him with a look-alike and sound-alike from another band. Kind of like the Judas Priest saga which turned into the movie "Rock Star" with Mark Wahlberg and Jennifer Anniston. Now, when the Sox invite "Journey" to play, are they inviting Steve Perry by himself, or the revamped Journey? For the two singers to shake hands and sing a song together like Peter Gabriel and Phil Collins did recently after their Genesis feud 30 years ago, it ain't looking good. As a matter of fact, BOTH Perry and the updated Journey were asked after the other said "no". Unless there's a 9th inning miracle, the Sox will have to settle for the "Greatest Hits" CD on their boom box. THAT'S the way I see it today! Happy Friday!

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Friday, October 21, 2005

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home