AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Wednesday, April 06, 2005 ----- BODY: Sylvester Stallone's loss is Favor Flav's gain. Here Bridgette tries a pair of Flav's gold choppers on for size. Posted by Hello Every now and again I'll go a few days without a decent night's sleep. This is in part, due to medication. When a night like this occurs, the only thing for me to do is click "on" the Comcast. It was around 2:00 AM this morning when I go right to VH1. They're going down the crapper too. I should have known I wouldn't see any videos. Instead, I stumble upon this goofy, nit-wit show with Public Enemy's Flavor Flav and Stallone's ex-wife, Bridgette Nielson (I'm sure I'm spelling her name wrong, but who cares?). Her big movie roles were in "Rocky IV" and "Beverly Hills Cop II." I guess she really needed the work because when your agent calls and tells you you're going to be in a sequel even though you weren't in the original, that's a bad sign the movie is doomed from the start. So I guess these two circus acts were in "The Surreal Life" ( a show so vulgar that The WB even said "no thanks") I tried to soak up as much information I could about "Strange Love." I guess these two hooked up during the previous show and it was so HILARIOUS, that VH1 gave them a show of their own! I'm looking for a word, any word to describe this train wreck. "Nasty" will have to do for now. Bridgette has a funny little drinking problem. She keeps a bottle of wine on the nightstand so when she wakes up in the afternoon, all she has to do is reach for it and start chugging away. Flav yelled at her about her drinking, and she said that in Italy where she's from, this is how it's done all the time. In this episode, Flav was going to take Bridgette to church to meet his Momma. Flav got all dressed up to the nines with a bright lime green suit and a matching top hat and sunglasses sans the gold teeth, and laced up his red Chuck Taylor high tops. He was waiting by the door and looking at the clock while Bridgette struggled to get out of bed. She took a few more swigs of wine and staggered across the room and put on a dress that was lying on the floor. Flav started yelling, "C'mon Bitch, weeza gotta go. I ain't playing now. Weeza a going to the &%$#@ church to meet my *&%* Momma and you're drunk already. Damn boy! This is &^%$ up!" Bridgette said, "OK you mother*&^%^, we're going to *&^%^$ church now." They were out the door with bottle of wine as Flav was getting nervous and yelled at her "You Bitch...you can't meet my Momma like that!" They take a limo to church and of course, it has a bar. When they get to church she tells Flav to "go ahead without her" and she drinks even more while in the car. Finally, as Flav and Bridgette enter the church service which was nearing the end, Bridgette did her best to pull herself together. She met Momma as well as the rest of the black neighborhood. People were flocking to her like she was Mother Theresa for autographs and photos! Bridgette then invited Flav's ex-wife to the hotel for a chat and he blew a gasket and started cursing at her and she at him and then they got into the limo and Bridgette picked up the drinking from where she left off and threatened Flav that she's going back to Italy where people worship her and don't treat her like dirt. Next week: The two kids yuck it up in Vegas. VH1 must have known that I was going to watch this. I checked on their website and they took all their contact information down, making it damn near impossible for me to write them. Since when is watching two people slide down a slippery slope supposed to be entertaining? If there's such a thing as rock bottom, not only are Flav and Bridgette there already, but so is VH1. ...And that's the way I see it. -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: VH1's "Happy Couple"

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

VH1's "Happy Couple"

Sylvester Stallone's loss is Favor Flav's gain. Here Bridgette tries a pair of Flav's gold choppers on for size. Posted by Hello Every now and again I'll go a few days without a decent night's sleep. This is in part, due to medication. When a night like this occurs, the only thing for me to do is click "on" the Comcast. It was around 2:00 AM this morning when I go right to VH1. They're going down the crapper too. I should have known I wouldn't see any videos. Instead, I stumble upon this goofy, nit-wit show with Public Enemy's Flavor Flav and Stallone's ex-wife, Bridgette Nielson (I'm sure I'm spelling her name wrong, but who cares?). Her big movie roles were in "Rocky IV" and "Beverly Hills Cop II." I guess she really needed the work because when your agent calls and tells you you're going to be in a sequel even though you weren't in the original, that's a bad sign the movie is doomed from the start. So I guess these two circus acts were in "The Surreal Life" ( a show so vulgar that The WB even said "no thanks") I tried to soak up as much information I could about "Strange Love." I guess these two hooked up during the previous show and it was so HILARIOUS, that VH1 gave them a show of their own! I'm looking for a word, any word to describe this train wreck. "Nasty" will have to do for now. Bridgette has a funny little drinking problem. She keeps a bottle of wine on the nightstand so when she wakes up in the afternoon, all she has to do is reach for it and start chugging away. Flav yelled at her about her drinking, and she said that in Italy where she's from, this is how it's done all the time. In this episode, Flav was going to take Bridgette to church to meet his Momma. Flav got all dressed up to the nines with a bright lime green suit and a matching top hat and sunglasses sans the gold teeth, and laced up his red Chuck Taylor high tops. He was waiting by the door and looking at the clock while Bridgette struggled to get out of bed. She took a few more swigs of wine and staggered across the room and put on a dress that was lying on the floor. Flav started yelling, "C'mon Bitch, weeza gotta go. I ain't playing now. Weeza a going to the &%$#@ church to meet my *&%* Momma and you're drunk already. Damn boy! This is &^%$ up!" Bridgette said, "OK you mother*&^%^, we're going to *&^%^$ church now." They were out the door with bottle of wine as Flav was getting nervous and yelled at her "You Bitch...you can't meet my Momma like that!" They take a limo to church and of course, it has a bar. When they get to church she tells Flav to "go ahead without her" and she drinks even more while in the car. Finally, as Flav and Bridgette enter the church service which was nearing the end, Bridgette did her best to pull herself together. She met Momma as well as the rest of the black neighborhood. People were flocking to her like she was Mother Theresa for autographs and photos! Bridgette then invited Flav's ex-wife to the hotel for a chat and he blew a gasket and started cursing at her and she at him and then they got into the limo and Bridgette picked up the drinking from where she left off and threatened Flav that she's going back to Italy where people worship her and don't treat her like dirt. Next week: The two kids yuck it up in Vegas. VH1 must have known that I was going to watch this. I checked on their website and they took all their contact information down, making it damn near impossible for me to write them. Since when is watching two people slide down a slippery slope supposed to be entertaining? If there's such a thing as rock bottom, not only are Flav and Bridgette there already, but so is VH1. ...And that's the way I see it.

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Wednesday, April 06, 2005

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