What's worse than working at a carnival? Try driving an ice cream truck!
I lost my sense of humor when I saw the Good Humor man riding through town. 
Today was officially the first day this shady character known as "The Ice Cream Man" rolled into town. If you read my other post about all the noise in my neighborhood, you'll see that I inadvertently left out the famous white truck with all the colorful stickers on the side like the "Places I've been" stickers that people put on the back of their campers. I'm really starting to believe that these guys are low life scum of the earth. They may even fall one step below the greasy guy at the carnival that operates the squeaky ferris wheel. I really do think that these guys are smoking the crack pipe before they hit the road. This guy drove by the house not once, not twice, but three times today. Wait! It gets better! Honest to God, he was playing Christmas music. Was that supposed to be funny? Then he was playing the song from "Love Story," you know, that piano song. What in the blue HELL do these things have to do with ice cream? I can tell it's going to be a long couple of months. All the neighborhood kids were already running to him like he was Big Bird. Why doesn't the ice cream man realize that you can get a whole friggin' box of Good Humor's at Dominick's for the same price as one dreamsicle that he's selling? This is highway robbery! Think about that when your kids pull on your pant leg when they hear the music play! This is only April bud. Come back in the middle of June when the kids are out of school, that is, if you have to come back at all. I really don't want you here! Now I have to take two more Tylenol because of that annoying music and before I go to bed, I've got a bucket full of rusty nails that I'm going to sprinkle in the street! That's how I see it!
posted by Dave Sypniewski at
Wednesday, April 06, 2005
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