AUTHOR: Dave Sypniewski DATE: Tuesday, November 15, 2005 ----- BODY: I am happy to announce the birth of our baby daughter which took place on November 10th! Arianna has been sleeping quite a bit since she arrived home however, it's just a matter of time before she gets included in this blog! Oh, that's a guarantee! ...It was a LONG journey that ended on a high note, but the 18 hours or whatever it was that it took for those of us to wait was...umm, boring. I wasn't too excited about walking into the hospital, but at the ssame time I didn't want to leave once I got there. Clint Eastwood was able to find his way out of Alcatraz with a nail clipper, and Tim Robbins was able to get out of Shawshank with a little homemade spoon. I on the other hand, couldn't find my way in or out of the hospital by myself or even with the help of the staff that spend about 16 hours a day in the place! I've got a few other complaints too that I'll just touch on briefly: For starters, every hospital I've either been at or visited, everyone always has a beef with the parking situation. How can a place with 1000 rooms have only 100 parking spots? Now I was never any good at math BUT...Why do the employees get the spots closest to the door? Ya know, many people can actually drive themselves or get a ride without the use of an ambulance! Suppose you have a dizzy spell and your neighbor drives you there, why should you have to walk a half a mile from your car to the ER and have to pass Corvettes, Mercedes, and Hummers along the way to the front door? I also say, treat the hospital with the same kind of respect you would give a four star hotel. Anything that isn't nailed down, take it with you. I'm not just talking the box of kleenex or the water pitcher...take the towels, toilet paper, pictures off the wall, even the IV machine...wheel it out with you. You paid for it! Lastly, I have to say, why is the television set in the waiting room so sacred? Even Indiana Jones snuck a peek at the Ark of the Covenant. There's always a really crappy station on and always a sign that says "Don't change the channel" Even though it was 2 AM and I was the only one in the waiting room with the replay of "Oprah" on, I had an uneasy feeling that I shouldn't change the channel. I then noticed the room had one of those "Eyes in the sky" like they have in Las Vegas. The gizmo that looks like a bowling ball stuck in the ceiling where they can catch cheaters counting the cards. Hard to believe it but, I pictured a room somewhere in the hospital that had four walls full of tv monitors and a half dozen guys monitoring my every move to make sure I didn't put on something else. Turns out though, Oprah was pretty good! THAT'S the way I see things today. -------- Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!: She's arrived...and "The Squealing Pig" is back!

Squealing Pig WORLDWIDE!

Tuesday, November 15, 2005

She's arrived...and "The Squealing Pig" is back!

I am happy to announce the birth of our baby daughter which took place on November 10th! Arianna has been sleeping quite a bit since she arrived home however, it's just a matter of time before she gets included in this blog! Oh, that's a guarantee! ...It was a LONG journey that ended on a high note, but the 18 hours or whatever it was that it took for those of us to wait was...umm, boring. I wasn't too excited about walking into the hospital, but at the ssame time I didn't want to leave once I got there. Clint Eastwood was able to find his way out of Alcatraz with a nail clipper, and Tim Robbins was able to get out of Shawshank with a little homemade spoon. I on the other hand, couldn't find my way in or out of the hospital by myself or even with the help of the staff that spend about 16 hours a day in the place! I've got a few other complaints too that I'll just touch on briefly: For starters, every hospital I've either been at or visited, everyone always has a beef with the parking situation. How can a place with 1000 rooms have only 100 parking spots? Now I was never any good at math BUT...Why do the employees get the spots closest to the door? Ya know, many people can actually drive themselves or get a ride without the use of an ambulance! Suppose you have a dizzy spell and your neighbor drives you there, why should you have to walk a half a mile from your car to the ER and have to pass Corvettes, Mercedes, and Hummers along the way to the front door? I also say, treat the hospital with the same kind of respect you would give a four star hotel. Anything that isn't nailed down, take it with you. I'm not just talking the box of kleenex or the water pitcher...take the towels, toilet paper, pictures off the wall, even the IV machine...wheel it out with you. You paid for it! Lastly, I have to say, why is the television set in the waiting room so sacred? Even Indiana Jones snuck a peek at the Ark of the Covenant. There's always a really crappy station on and always a sign that says "Don't change the channel" Even though it was 2 AM and I was the only one in the waiting room with the replay of "Oprah" on, I had an uneasy feeling that I shouldn't change the channel. I then noticed the room had one of those "Eyes in the sky" like they have in Las Vegas. The gizmo that looks like a bowling ball stuck in the ceiling where they can catch cheaters counting the cards. Hard to believe it but, I pictured a room somewhere in the hospital that had four walls full of tv monitors and a half dozen guys monitoring my every move to make sure I didn't put on something else. Turns out though, Oprah was pretty good! THAT'S the way I see things today.

posted by Dave Sypniewski at Tuesday, November 15, 2005

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